Well! I guess that I never really considered myself to be old....I'm trendy, hip, up with the times etc....I guess I just gave myself away. :) I work in a coffee shop with a lot of people in their twenties. I find myself reflecting on my own twenties. How wisely did I spend them? Was there a lot of drama and turmoil? What did I learn?
I remember thinking that I was going to travel the world. No one would hold me down or back! I would pick up and move at the drop of a hat. I would continue to have new experiences and new friends. Maybe I would never marry and that would be OK. I would then be the cool, eclectic aunt to all of my nieces and nephews. I thought that if I wanted to have a child...I would adopt. Yeah, I would adopt from a third world country and give a child a great chance at life. I would make a difference!
I find myself to be in the oddest of spots. I am right back where I started. I live in a very small town in a very lightly populated state. I traveled. I moved around.....A LOT. I have/had many, many colorful and fun friends. (barely a few sharing a common belief).
Now, I live in a town I grew up in for the first 18 years of my life. I am married and I have an absolutely amazing and exhausting two year old son. I came back to what I feel is home. I married a man that was one year younger than me. We never talked in high school, but always admired the other from a far. I didn't know I could or would ever have a child. I wanted a girl soooo bad! I have a boy....and I love him more than I never knew I could.
My life has changed! I drive home from work. I drive past the tank (yes, a tank) that I remember playing on when I was a child. I come home to a very nice house that was a classmates of mine in the third grade. It has a dog barking, a little boy singing, laughing or crying, a husband watching his hunting programs. I look around at the mess and I am satisfied. People always say that the grass is greener on the other side of the fence...for a change, "they" are right.
I remember thinking that I was going to travel the world. No one would hold me down or back! I would pick up and move at the drop of a hat. I would continue to have new experiences and new friends. Maybe I would never marry and that would be OK. I would then be the cool, eclectic aunt to all of my nieces and nephews. I thought that if I wanted to have a child...I would adopt. Yeah, I would adopt from a third world country and give a child a great chance at life. I would make a difference!
I find myself to be in the oddest of spots. I am right back where I started. I live in a very small town in a very lightly populated state. I traveled. I moved around.....A LOT. I have/had many, many colorful and fun friends. (barely a few sharing a common belief).
Now, I live in a town I grew up in for the first 18 years of my life. I am married and I have an absolutely amazing and exhausting two year old son. I came back to what I feel is home. I married a man that was one year younger than me. We never talked in high school, but always admired the other from a far. I didn't know I could or would ever have a child. I wanted a girl soooo bad! I have a boy....and I love him more than I never knew I could.
My life has changed! I drive home from work. I drive past the tank (yes, a tank) that I remember playing on when I was a child. I come home to a very nice house that was a classmates of mine in the third grade. It has a dog barking, a little boy singing, laughing or crying, a husband watching his hunting programs. I look around at the mess and I am satisfied. People always say that the grass is greener on the other side of the fence...for a change, "they" are right.
3 comments:
Hey - I found you! I love hearing that you are so happy. I'm so glad that your journey brought you home again.
Love you!
Hey Lisa !!! I finally found you! Your writing is awesome, who knew? LOL Turns out, this family is full of intriguing writers. Im so glad that you are happy and you sound so content. And your such an awesome Mommy! Daniel is one blessed little boy! This is gonna be fun, to visit each others blogs. Love you much! -Mindy
Wow. Good work.:)
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